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Growing up, I felt that my parents were too controlling.
Controlling in almost every aspect of my life. My clothes, the food I eat, my friends, my taste in my fashion and gadgets, my hairstyle, going out with my friends, finances, etc.
It was not easy for me to even make plans with my friends as I did not have the freedom to go out as I please. I literally go to school, home, tuition classes, home again and that’s it.
If I wanted to go out with a friend to the mall or movies, I had to ask permission and make plans a few days to weeks in advance. Hence, I really looked forward to going to school or tuition classes.
As I entered Form 6, I was finally allowed to drive on my own to school. However, I had to go from home to school and back home. Nowhere else.
Of course, all of this was for my own good.
When I entered university, despite having my own car back home, I was not allowed to drive as I am 5 hours away from home and they were just looking out for my safety. My fellow classmates had the privilege of driving to classes and to head out as they please whereas I had to rely on public transportations or e-hailing services. Most of the time I would rely on public transportations as e-hailing services can be rather expensive and I was running short on my monthly allowance. This means leaving extremely early.
Now that I am back home, things are much different.
I’m allowed to go out as I please as long as I come home before nightfall and not beyond the district borders. Yes, district borders, forget state borders, that’s out of boundaries.
Anyway, I do not go out as much as all I would want to do is just to sit and write or work on the content for my YouTube channel. The times that I do go out alone would usually be to church or to visit my best friends, Evina and Shilpa.
I appreciate the company provided by my parents. The downside of it is that, since I am at home, despite me taking care of the household chores, since I simply cannot stand dusts and mess, I am deemed as being too free.
Going into deep work is difficult as I am constantly being interrupted. Sitting and writing is difficult because there is always noise and it reaches an ear-piercing decibel. Besides that, the moment I am finally done with my chores for the day and is able to work on my “projects“, suddenly there is a need to head out and after reaching back home, my energy would usually be completely depleted and I am unable to work on what I love which in return, makes me irritable.
Hence, what does freedom mean to me?
To me, freedom means being in control of my own timing and activities. That and of course, financial freedom.
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The Theoretical Doctor 